Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Making Plans

Anyone who knows me, knows I'm a planner. So naturally, Gard and I have been making all sorts of plans for our life together (knowing full well that life never goes according to plan). We have a lot of similar ideas about things we'd like to do, but there is one thing we can't seem to agree on: motorcycles. He loves them, I hate them. Luckily we got that worked out over g-chat today.

me: i wish you could watch this Sunday Morning with me right now
Gard: me too! what are you learning about?
me: it's about a 100 year old ski racer who rides a motorcycle
Gard: what?? how did they interview me in the future?
me: ha. you can have a motorcycle when you turn 100
Gard: before then
like 80
at the latest
me: ok, 80
Gard: but only if you're not still around
me: ok, fair
Gard: i'm buying one the day you check out
me: i'll leave a motorcycle for you in my will
Gard: haha
me: fine by me
Gard: ok
me: deal
Gard: no point hanging out by myself
me: you can ride your motorcycle around
and then it won't be as much of a tragedy when you get run over
Gard: haha
me: because you'll be coming to see me
Gard: thanks hun
me: you're welcome

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Who would've thought?

A few minutes after we got engaged.

A year and a half ago, I was at Sunday dinner with my parents and we got talking about dating. One thing led to another and I ended up laying in my mom's lap crying (yes, at 26 sometimes a good cry in your mom's lap is the only thing that will make you feel better). I just didn't get it. How did people fall in love and get married? It all just seemed so far off for me. Little did I know, the boy I would end up loving was already very much a part of my life, the time just had to be right.

I was busy looking for the guy I thought I wanted. I thought I'd marry some guy who was studying business or dentistry (maybe because that's 95% of the guys at BYU?) or maybe some guy who loved sports and dressed in business casual and had all of the same interests as me. I knew lots of those guys and they were all great, but I often found myself being self-conscious and trying to force something that wasn't there. It just wasn't working.

So imagine my surprise when I found myself falling for Gard (who was not what I was looking for, but way better for me in so many ways). We'd been friends with for a couple of years and in that time I'd become so comfortable not only around him, but more comfortable around me- more comfortable in my own skin. I was able to be myself with him. One of the first times that Gard and I went to lunch together (a year and a half or so before we started dating), I picked apart my entire sandwich and did a bunch of things I'd never do in front of a date and remarked, "It's a good thing you're not trying to date me." And that was the trick- he wasn't trying to date me, we were just becoming friends and that made all the difference.

It didn't matter that he adored all things outdoors and I'd only spent a lifetime total of 4 nights in a tent. I didn't get hung up on the fact that while I occasionally enjoyed sporting events, he was unfamiliar with the term "first down". Whether or not Gard liked The Dixie Chicks (he doesn't), I still liked them and whether or not I loved to ski, Gard still loved it and still loved me. I quit looking for all of those things I thought I wanted and found all of the things I needed (and didn't even realize it!) in Gard. I quit looking for the guy in a suit who had all the same interests and was able to look at Gard in his skinny jeans and t-shirts and fall in love with his kindness and sense of humor and intelligence (and adorable nerdiness!- the cool kind, not the weird kind) and testimony, etc etc etc. And miracle of all miracles, he fell in love with me!

It's not like Gard was looking for me either. I'm sure he thought he'd end up with a girl who loved to rock climb and ski black diamonds and who maybe knew a thing or two about science. But that wasn't me and ultimately he didn't care. Even though I still pick apart my food and have only skied 3 times in my entire life and get overly excited about stupid things and talk way too fast for any one's good, he likes me. Somehow with all of our differences, we understand each other and make one another happy. So a few weeks ago when we were baking in our pajamas and I turned around to find him on one knee in the kitchen, it was a resounding, "YES!" (well, after I said, "Really?! Wait, you're supposed to tell me nice things."). Who would've thought?

Calling Chickee to share the good news.